The following list is one I've been compiling for a short while, like maybe a month or so...so you can imagine how strange my world in child care is. And again....I work in child care so you need to try to imagine these things in context...
1. Marky...stop licking the stereo!
2. Can you get the monkey out of my pocket?
3. Does anyone know why there is a COW in the microwave?
4. Do you put the lentils in the castle at YOUR house? That's just not nice!
5. Okay everyone...who else has boogers for me to fix?
6. Did you poo? Show me the poo...
7. Did you bury her shoe by the slide or the swing?
8. I am pretty sure that no one else wants to see your penis Marky, lets' keep your pants up okay?
9. Did I just hear someone puke? (This was on the bus, on our way to a field trip destination)
There are more...but child care also has a way of sucking brain cells right out of you so I forget some of the really good ones.
How about you...do you remember any prize quotes?
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15 comments:
your second last sentance sums it all up. which is why i can't resond to the last one. they're all forgotten. i left my brain cells at the arborg play group!
but here's one my friend's little sister said years ago. (i only remember it because it was from my pre-daycare [and thus pre-brian-cell-loss] days) after letting out a loud little fart, she exclaimed, as if being surprised at the sound: "i burped. it came from my bum!"
"Mommy does not want to eat your regurgitated apple bits" is one that springs readily to mind.
There are more. A lot more. I tend to blog the good ones as they happen, whenever possible.
I worked in early childhood ed for 16 years. I'm pretty sure I know "Marky"
Here's one:
Me: Abby, what will happen if I have to tell Mommy about your behavior?
Abby: She will "punch" me.
Me: Excuse me?
Abby: She "punched" me last night and she will "punch" me again if I get in trouble.
(Abby's mom was also a teacher at the school where I was the principal so this naturally disturbed me. However, I finally figured out that she meant PUNISH, not punch.)
One Christmas, gifting our daughter, then 5, with a beautiful pink canopy with a feather boa around the crown, she asked, "Mommy, what is it?" I explained, "Oh sweetie, Santa Clause brought you a Princess Canopy for your bed." She replied, "why would Santa give anyone a can of pee?" Smiles!
Children say the best things! If only we could hold onto that poetry!
hahha- those are great!! i work with kids too, in a cancer center- so even in the middle of a not so great situation, we get asome gems. sometimes they yell out really funny stuff- this is my favorite:
boy: dad, is ass a bad word?
dad: yes, we don't say that word.
later on...
boy: i think those nurses are A-S-Ses.
dad: we don't say that word!!!
boy: i didn't say it, i spelled it!
*wipes tears*
Oh mommyhood. Isn't it grand?
Just found your blog via SITS and love it. Finally, someone who can relate to my warped sense of humor! I love #5 & #6. I'm always changing poo, finding it or wiping buggies. Augh, the joys of mommyhood!
There are a ton of things I say or have said that I never in a million years would've thought I'd utter.
The latest is that I've been having to tell my four year old ALL THE TIME, "Keep your tongue in your mouth!"
ROLF! I teach pre-k and it's a whole different world I tell ya! Loved your list!
{{{chucklin}}} I am many years removed from the year I worked in a daycare center, but I know my kids have had some doozies over the years ... of course my 12 year old with the statues needing to cover their "junk" was pretty good!
Thanks for the smiles!
Things I'd never thought I would say: "I'm so bored." Oops, wrong blog, wrong column.This is about child care and I was talking about my l month into retirement. Maybe I should come and help you with them kidlets.
Love you hon, hang in there. This too shall pass!
Today...stopping riding his shoe and bring me Canada (a puzzle we have)!
Just thought I should keep track of these 'funnies' somehow.
Oh my gosh, I found your blog while hopping around and almost died laughing at this list.
You have a great sense of humor, which I am sure is needed in child care.
You absolutely brightened my night!!!!
Hi! I found you through "blogs around the world". This post is SO funny. I actually did one like this back in June! The 3 things i will never forget saying are:
"Don't play with the dog poo."
"Don't lick you're brother's bum."
"Next time you get poop on your finger, don't wipe it on the wall."
"Josh, come listen to the potatoes; they sound like birds!"
and
"Abbi, the old man is still in my pocket!" are among my favorite things I thought I'd never say.
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